Little by little, I will get by,
Step by step, I will reach it high,
Moving on, Looking forward,
Waiting for the brand new day to arrive.
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Moving on... Looking forward...
Little by little, I will get by,
Step by step, I will reach it high,
Moving on, Looking forward,
Waiting for the brand new day to arrive.
Sunday, August 22, 2010
If Only…
I hate these feelings
This feeling of loneliness
This feeling of emptiness
This feeling of being left alone
This feeling of wanting someone
I can't contact you
You're out of reach
I can't see you
You seem so far
I'm missing your voice
I'm missing your frown
I'm missing your smile
I'm missing YOU
If only I can see your smile and capture it in frames
If only I can hold your hands and never let it go
If only I can walk with you, wherever, whenever
If only I can
I would...
This feeling of loneliness
This feeling of emptiness
This feeling of being left alone
This feeling of wanting someone
I can't contact you
You're out of reach
I can't see you
You seem so far
I'm missing your voice
I'm missing your frown
I'm missing your smile
I'm missing YOU
If only I can see your smile and capture it in frames
If only I can hold your hands and never let it go
If only I can walk with you, wherever, whenever
If only I can
I would...
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Change...
if you didn't saw me as a changed person before... i'm sorry for that...
i never loved anyone else the way i loved you... and still loving you...
you can't blame me for losing my positive side...
you can't blame me for shouting negatively...
only i, myself, is to blame...
i never loved anyone else the way i loved you... and still loving you...
you can't blame me for losing my positive side...
you can't blame me for shouting negatively...
only i, myself, is to blame...
Monday, August 2, 2010
Loving Someone From A Distance...
Sometimes, in our relentless efforts to find the person we love we fail to recognize and appreciate the people who love us. We miss out on so many beautiful things and simply because we allow ourselves to been slaved by our own selfish concerns.
Go for the person of deeds and not for the person of words for you will find rewarding happiness not with the person you love but the person who loves you more. The best lovers are those who are capable of loving from a distance, far enough to allow the other person to grow, but never too far to feel the love deep within your being.
To let go of someone doesn’t mean you have to stop loving, it only means that you allow that person to find their own HAPPINESS without expecting the person to come back. Letting go is not just setting the other person free, but it is also setting yourself free from all fears, bitterness, hatred, and anger that you keep in your heart.
Do not let the bitterness rare away your strength and weaken your faith, and never allow pain to dishearten you, but rather let you grow with wisdom in bearing it. You may have found peace in just loving someone from a distance not expecting anything in return. But be careful, for this can sustain life but can never give enough room for us to grow.
We can all survive with just beautiful memories of the past but real peace and happiness come only with open acceptance of what reality is today. There comes a time in our lives when we chance upon someone so nice and we just find ourselves getting so intensely attracted to that person. This feeling soon become a part of our everyday lives and eventually consumes our thoughts and actions.
The sad part of it is when we begin to realize that this person feels nothing more for us than just friendship, or the feelings the person might have for you is just too far from how you love that person. We start our desperate attempt to get noticed and be closer but in the end our efforts are still un-rewarded and we end up being sorry for ourselves.
You don’t have to be bitter on love. What you need to learn is how to accept the verdict of reality without being bitter or sorry for yourself. Believe me, you would be better off giving that dedication and love someone more deserving. Don’t let your heart run your life, be sensible and let your mind speak for itself. Listen not only to your feelings but also to reason as well. Always remember that if you lose someone today, it means that someone better is coming tomorrow: If you lose love it doesn’t mean that you failed in love. Cry, if you have to, but make it sure that the tears wash away the hurt and the bitterness that the past has left with you.
Let go of yesterday and love will find its way back to you. And when it does, pray that it may be the love that will stay and last a lifetime.
“When you lose someone, and you think you were the one who loved most, between the two of you, that someone lost more. For someday you can love someone the way that you loved that someone, but that someone will never be loved again the way that you did.”
I Still Believe In Happy Endings...
Go for the person of deeds and not for the person of words for you will find rewarding happiness not with the person you love but the person who loves you more. The best lovers are those who are capable of loving from a distance, far enough to allow the other person to grow, but never too far to feel the love deep within your being.
To let go of someone doesn’t mean you have to stop loving, it only means that you allow that person to find their own HAPPINESS without expecting the person to come back. Letting go is not just setting the other person free, but it is also setting yourself free from all fears, bitterness, hatred, and anger that you keep in your heart.
Do not let the bitterness rare away your strength and weaken your faith, and never allow pain to dishearten you, but rather let you grow with wisdom in bearing it. You may have found peace in just loving someone from a distance not expecting anything in return. But be careful, for this can sustain life but can never give enough room for us to grow.
We can all survive with just beautiful memories of the past but real peace and happiness come only with open acceptance of what reality is today. There comes a time in our lives when we chance upon someone so nice and we just find ourselves getting so intensely attracted to that person. This feeling soon become a part of our everyday lives and eventually consumes our thoughts and actions.
The sad part of it is when we begin to realize that this person feels nothing more for us than just friendship, or the feelings the person might have for you is just too far from how you love that person. We start our desperate attempt to get noticed and be closer but in the end our efforts are still un-rewarded and we end up being sorry for ourselves.
You don’t have to be bitter on love. What you need to learn is how to accept the verdict of reality without being bitter or sorry for yourself. Believe me, you would be better off giving that dedication and love someone more deserving. Don’t let your heart run your life, be sensible and let your mind speak for itself. Listen not only to your feelings but also to reason as well. Always remember that if you lose someone today, it means that someone better is coming tomorrow: If you lose love it doesn’t mean that you failed in love. Cry, if you have to, but make it sure that the tears wash away the hurt and the bitterness that the past has left with you.
Let go of yesterday and love will find its way back to you. And when it does, pray that it may be the love that will stay and last a lifetime.
“When you lose someone, and you think you were the one who loved most, between the two of you, that someone lost more. For someday you can love someone the way that you loved that someone, but that someone will never be loved again the way that you did.”
I Still Believe In Happy Endings...
Friday, July 30, 2010
Person...
Sometimes we were so messed up, we forget what's the worth of a person who once touched our life. This person already surrendered itself on helping us make it through this hardships we're in. Guide as along the way, clear our path, straighten our lives, and yet we still end up wounding the person deeply, so deeply that the person couldn't help but breakdown and cry.
For the second time in our life, we hurt the person, break the person. We were so focused on ourselves. We we're being so insensitive. So insensitive that we only think of ourselves, we only want the spotlight for us.
We don't do that! We don't need to be selfish. We need to understand the person too. We need to understand that we were putting the person too in this hardships we're in. We need this person. We can't do this on our own.
Yes we're brave, strong, independent. But being brave, strong and independent is not enough. We need the person to guide us, teach us what's right from wrong, teach us how to handle these kind of things, show us the light at the end of the dark tunnel, and most of all, be there for us along the way until the end.
For the second time in our life, we hurt the person, break the person. We were so focused on ourselves. We we're being so insensitive. So insensitive that we only think of ourselves, we only want the spotlight for us.
We don't do that! We don't need to be selfish. We need to understand the person too. We need to understand that we were putting the person too in this hardships we're in. We need this person. We can't do this on our own.
Yes we're brave, strong, independent. But being brave, strong and independent is not enough. We need the person to guide us, teach us what's right from wrong, teach us how to handle these kind of things, show us the light at the end of the dark tunnel, and most of all, be there for us along the way until the end.
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Sana...
Sana kaya kitang pasayahin... pasayahing muli... sana kaya kitang alagaan... alagaan muli ... sana akin ka na lang... akin ka na lang muli... sana ako na lang.. ako na lang ulit... Sana makita ka... makitang muli... sana makasama ka... makasamang muli... sana habambuhay... magpakailanman...
Saturday, July 10, 2010
Nothing...
It all started out as just plain nothing
From nothing it became something
From something it became existent
From existence it became life
From life it became the beginning
From beginning it became the ending
From ending it became death
From death it became something
Something that ended back to nothing...
From nothing it became something
From something it became existent
From existence it became life
From life it became the beginning
From beginning it became the ending
From ending it became death
From death it became something
Something that ended back to nothing...
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Borrowed Time...
Sooner or later, I'll pass away. When I'm gone, I know you'll miss me. You'll realize how much you were cared for, how much you were treasured, and how much I loved you.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
3 Things...
There are 3 THINGS a person needs in life.
1 - LOVE - to make you weak.
2 - ALCOHOL - to make you strong.
3 - FRIENDS - to pick you up when LOVE and ALCOHOL made you hit the floor.
1 - LOVE - to make you weak.
2 - ALCOHOL - to make you strong.
3 - FRIENDS - to pick you up when LOVE and ALCOHOL made you hit the floor.
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Just In Love Living In A Nirvana…
It’s almost two months now but seems it’s like forever. I’m still feeling this emptiness, this large part of my heart that’s missing, this pain and this sadness. I can still feel my heart breaking into million pieces. I’m still waking up at night just to find myself crying.
But I need to get past these things. I need to move on and stand up. But the big question is “HOW?”
How can I remove someone that’s already been part of my soul? How can I stop loving someone just by the flick of my fingers or just by a blink of an eye? How can I not long for that embrace where everything would be okay? How can I not miss someone’s voice that’s music to my ears? How can I not miss those big brown eyes that when they look at me, I can see my own soul?
She created a deep well within me. She filled it up with laughter and happiness, joyous things that I never imagined. And now, that well is still wide and deep, but filled with sorrow and longing. How can I empty a bottomless well?
It is so easy to fall in love. But to recover from love or to get over from love, it might be easier to retrieve and collect every drop of rain that falls from the sky and put them back to the clouds where they fell.
After several wondrous months of being with her, loving her, adoring her, caring for her, constantly looking for new ways to express my affection and devotion, I must abruptly give that up. I must simply not to love her anymore. How am I supposed to make soul-deep love die?
I have lived through those dark hours in my life. I have lived through my share of troubling emotions in my life. I have developed strength and endurance that carried me across seas of sadness and through fields of fear. But is this a challenge for which I am not equipped? Am I facing a formidable foe? Am I weaker than I imagined?
Who knows if time really heals all wounds, or ever diminished this love. Is there a love that time can never break their hold? So great, so profound and so true. My love for her grew into immense proportion and reaches the deepest of my soul. Some of my friends told me that these sweet memories, both thrill and torture will fade into pleasant, unemotional, recollections. But I still wonder, how can my eyes forget a beauty that once made them cry? How can my skin forget those soft fingers that expressed tender love and care?
Images of her may fade. But memories of her are etched into my being that I fear will only be gone when I’m gone. I know that I am like a bird with broken wings, it will heal and fly again. But I am afraid that I will not fly again as high as I flew with her. It seems that this great love, this magnificent love with so much laughter and happiness, is a burden that puts me in emotional quicksand, pulling me down, suffocating me and killing me. And this love is an ultimate irony. It takes me both to the highest of high and to the lowest of low. It brings happiness, it brings devastation. It made me a hero and a fool. It made me whole and broke me apart. Why do I grieve so? No one died, only my heart. I am alive but not well. I've lost something I cherished, and for which there is no replacement.
I would not give up the love I shared with her. Even suffering is ahead, I would choose it again, for this love is worth whatever price, whatever pain. Even in my grief and hurt, I still thank God for letting me experienced this wonderful and overwhelming love.
So here I am, in love, without the love of my life on my side. No quick fix to cure me of this condition. No blinking of an eye, no crossing of fingers. And if does one manage to accomplish things like this quickly, I’ll say that it is not a true love. So I must simply endure and wait. Wait until my life fades, wait until the gradual erosion of my love, just as the sea rush to shore, just as the wind blows into an empty space, just as the moon goes round the earth. Just as our seasons change, so I shall make the best, little by little, moment by moment, day by day, moving in tiny fractions of time until one day I’ll wake up and realize, I do not love her. Or will I?
Just In Love Living In A Nirvana… I still believe in HAPPY ENDINGS…
But I need to get past these things. I need to move on and stand up. But the big question is “HOW?”
How can I remove someone that’s already been part of my soul? How can I stop loving someone just by the flick of my fingers or just by a blink of an eye? How can I not long for that embrace where everything would be okay? How can I not miss someone’s voice that’s music to my ears? How can I not miss those big brown eyes that when they look at me, I can see my own soul?
She created a deep well within me. She filled it up with laughter and happiness, joyous things that I never imagined. And now, that well is still wide and deep, but filled with sorrow and longing. How can I empty a bottomless well?
It is so easy to fall in love. But to recover from love or to get over from love, it might be easier to retrieve and collect every drop of rain that falls from the sky and put them back to the clouds where they fell.
After several wondrous months of being with her, loving her, adoring her, caring for her, constantly looking for new ways to express my affection and devotion, I must abruptly give that up. I must simply not to love her anymore. How am I supposed to make soul-deep love die?
I have lived through those dark hours in my life. I have lived through my share of troubling emotions in my life. I have developed strength and endurance that carried me across seas of sadness and through fields of fear. But is this a challenge for which I am not equipped? Am I facing a formidable foe? Am I weaker than I imagined?
Who knows if time really heals all wounds, or ever diminished this love. Is there a love that time can never break their hold? So great, so profound and so true. My love for her grew into immense proportion and reaches the deepest of my soul. Some of my friends told me that these sweet memories, both thrill and torture will fade into pleasant, unemotional, recollections. But I still wonder, how can my eyes forget a beauty that once made them cry? How can my skin forget those soft fingers that expressed tender love and care?
Images of her may fade. But memories of her are etched into my being that I fear will only be gone when I’m gone. I know that I am like a bird with broken wings, it will heal and fly again. But I am afraid that I will not fly again as high as I flew with her. It seems that this great love, this magnificent love with so much laughter and happiness, is a burden that puts me in emotional quicksand, pulling me down, suffocating me and killing me. And this love is an ultimate irony. It takes me both to the highest of high and to the lowest of low. It brings happiness, it brings devastation. It made me a hero and a fool. It made me whole and broke me apart. Why do I grieve so? No one died, only my heart. I am alive but not well. I've lost something I cherished, and for which there is no replacement.
I would not give up the love I shared with her. Even suffering is ahead, I would choose it again, for this love is worth whatever price, whatever pain. Even in my grief and hurt, I still thank God for letting me experienced this wonderful and overwhelming love.
So here I am, in love, without the love of my life on my side. No quick fix to cure me of this condition. No blinking of an eye, no crossing of fingers. And if does one manage to accomplish things like this quickly, I’ll say that it is not a true love. So I must simply endure and wait. Wait until my life fades, wait until the gradual erosion of my love, just as the sea rush to shore, just as the wind blows into an empty space, just as the moon goes round the earth. Just as our seasons change, so I shall make the best, little by little, moment by moment, day by day, moving in tiny fractions of time until one day I’ll wake up and realize, I do not love her. Or will I?
Just In Love Living In A Nirvana… I still believe in HAPPY ENDINGS…
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Fragile...
How does one remove something that has become part of his soul? And consider my condition. My heart does not feel broken so much as it feels as if it has simply stopped. Yet in this fragile state, I am expected to summon up the will and strength to overcome love, the world's strongest force?
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Monday, June 14, 2010
Why...
Why can’t I stop missing you? Cause I need you. Why can’t I stop caring for you? Cause you mean so much to me. Why do I need you in my life? Cause you’re the only one who makes my life complete. Why am I saying this to you? Cause I love you so much that I can never let you go.
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Images Of You...
Will my eyes ever forget a beauty that once stunned them into tears? Will my skin forget the fingers that expressed such tender love through the softest of touches? Will my ears not recall the laughter that, in the worst of times, made life brim with hope and spirit? And how shall my heart forget the love and devotion that made every emotion I ever felt before seem pale in comparison? Yes, the images may fade, and recollections of words and events will probably get fuzzy. But there are memories so integrated into my being that I fear they shall pass only when I do.
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Her Essence...
I loved her with a desperate passion, not just in the way a body longs for another body, but with an intense passion for her soul, her essence. Now I miss her with the same fervor and ferocity with which I loved her and it is almost as if my pain is now my passion in how it consumes my heart and fills my days.
Friday, June 11, 2010
Pag-ibig...
May makakapagsabi ba sa akin kung paano tanggalin ang tanikala ng pag-ibig? Paano ko matatakasan ang mahigpit na hawak ng pinagmumulan ng dalamhati, kalungkutan at kahungkagan? Paano ako hindi na iibig?
Dumadaloy ang mga payo ng aking mga kaibigan, “manatiling abala”, sabi nila. Ngunit ang pag-ibig ay mabigat na nasa puso ko kahit anong gawin ko. “Wag mo syang isipin”, payo nila. At hindi na rin ba ako hihinga? “Humanap ka ng iba”, rekomendasyon nila. Napupulot ba sa kalsada ang pag-ibig?
Tunay na pag-ibig ay hindi napapalitan, tiyak na hindi sa kaswal na palasintahan. Naniniwala ako na walang simpleng pamamaraan, o mga alituntunin kung paano hindi na umibig. Ang pag-ibig ay kusang dumadating, at kusang aalis kapag ito ay handa na, at hindi bago paman. At habang lumalakas ang pag-ibig, mas humahaba ang panahon nito.
O, tama, panahon -- ang dakilang manggagamot, sinasabi nila, ang tanging kilalang ginhawa. Ngunit hindi ako mabigyan ng kaginhawaan ngayon, hindi rin tiyak kinabukasan o marahil kahit sa susunod na isang libong kinabukasan.
Sabi sa lyrics ng kantang "I Need You Back" by Lea Salonga
Since you`ve gone I`ve always been alone
Feeling down and sorry for myself
I look at your picture and there I find
I won`t make it through another rain
Without your sunshine
I need you back...
I need you here to guide me
Please come back
You`re the only one who`s ever loved me
I need you back
Let`s start all over again
Share the love you had for me then
Dumadaloy ang mga payo ng aking mga kaibigan, “manatiling abala”, sabi nila. Ngunit ang pag-ibig ay mabigat na nasa puso ko kahit anong gawin ko. “Wag mo syang isipin”, payo nila. At hindi na rin ba ako hihinga? “Humanap ka ng iba”, rekomendasyon nila. Napupulot ba sa kalsada ang pag-ibig?
Tunay na pag-ibig ay hindi napapalitan, tiyak na hindi sa kaswal na palasintahan. Naniniwala ako na walang simpleng pamamaraan, o mga alituntunin kung paano hindi na umibig. Ang pag-ibig ay kusang dumadating, at kusang aalis kapag ito ay handa na, at hindi bago paman. At habang lumalakas ang pag-ibig, mas humahaba ang panahon nito.
O, tama, panahon -- ang dakilang manggagamot, sinasabi nila, ang tanging kilalang ginhawa. Ngunit hindi ako mabigyan ng kaginhawaan ngayon, hindi rin tiyak kinabukasan o marahil kahit sa susunod na isang libong kinabukasan.
Sabi sa lyrics ng kantang "I Need You Back" by Lea Salonga
Since you`ve gone I`ve always been alone
Feeling down and sorry for myself
I look at your picture and there I find
I won`t make it through another rain
Without your sunshine
I need you back...
I need you here to guide me
Please come back
You`re the only one who`s ever loved me
I need you back
Let`s start all over again
Share the love you had for me then
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Mundo...
Kung lahat ng tao eh kagaya mo, ayoko nang tumira dito sa mundong ito! Lilipat na ko ng planeta! Kase kung lahat ng nilalang eh kapareho mo, mahihirapan ako. Aba! Mahirap mahalin ang buong mundo!
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Holding on...
I keep holding on. Some say I'm stupid. Some say I'm crazy. But, they can never know what it was like. They can never know how it felt. I keep loving you. Most people call me pathetic. Most people call me insane. But, they can never know what I'm going through. They will never see what I see. They will never feel the way I feel. So, I'll just keep holding on and keep on loving you.
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
Today...
Today, I love you more than I did yesterday. Tomorrow, I know I'll love you more than I do today. It's the unexplainable thing that I go through each and everyday. Falling even more in love with you in every single way.
Monday, June 7, 2010
Give up on her...
Once I fell in love with someone very special and I told myself that I'll never gonna give up on her. But a month and a half ago, she asked me to. I tried really hard, but I couldn't. Kasi mahal na mahal ko sya.
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Reason...
You're the reason I live, you're the reason I'd die, you're the reason I smile yet breakdown and cry. You're the reason I keep going and the reason I fall. But without you in my life, I'm nothing at all.
Friday, June 4, 2010
Ulan…
Tag-ulan na naman. Nakikiramay sa akin ang panahon. Nakikisabay sa pagluha ng aking damdamin. Sa pagdadalamhati at pangungulila. Sa pag-asang may babalik pa.
Sana pagkatapos ng tag-ulan, dumating ang tag-araw sa buhay ko at sana ako ay hindi na luluha pang muli.
Ngunit ngayon, sige, buhos pa ulan at mundo ko ay lunuring tuluyan, kung hatid mo man ay bagyo, dalangin ito ng puso kong sumasamo.
Sabi nga sa lyrics ng “Crying in the Rain” by Everly Brothers
Raindrops falling from heaven
Could never wash away my misery
But since we're not together
I'll look for stormy weather
To hide these tears I hope you'll never see
Sana sa darating na tag-araw… sana ako ay hindi na luluha pang muli…
Sana pagkatapos ng tag-ulan, dumating ang tag-araw sa buhay ko at sana ako ay hindi na luluha pang muli.
Ngunit ngayon, sige, buhos pa ulan at mundo ko ay lunuring tuluyan, kung hatid mo man ay bagyo, dalangin ito ng puso kong sumasamo.
Sabi nga sa lyrics ng “Crying in the Rain” by Everly Brothers
Raindrops falling from heaven
Could never wash away my misery
But since we're not together
I'll look for stormy weather
To hide these tears I hope you'll never see
Sana sa darating na tag-araw… sana ako ay hindi na luluha pang muli…
My side...
It's wrong for me to say that I can't live without you.
Because I have lived my life before I knew you.
So, Instead of saying that, I'd rather tell you this
"I would live a better life with you by my side..."
Because I have lived my life before I knew you.
So, Instead of saying that, I'd rather tell you this
"I would live a better life with you by my side..."
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Life With You...
If someone would ask me what a beautiful life means, I would take out my wallet, show to them your picture and answer them with a smile, "LIFE WITH HER IS SO DAMN BEAUTIFUL."
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Better...
If I can just make everything fall where it should be, I would. If I could make life better for you, I would. But I can’t. All I can do is to let you know that mine has been better because of you.
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Wondering...
I often catch myself constantly wondering how you are, sitting alone with my mind set so far, reminiscing about your smile, your voice and touch. Damn this life! I’m missing you too much!
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Monday, May 24, 2010
Bakit...
Bakit nga ba ganon? Alam ko naman na kahit maka isang-libong text ako, hindi ka magrereply. Alam ko naman na kahit mag-email ako, hindi ka pa rin magrereply. Alam ko na kahit mag ym message ako, hindi ka talaga magrereply. Alam ko rin na kahit nababasa mo blogs ko, hindi ka pa rin magrereply.
Bakit nga ba ganon? Alam ko na itong lahat na ito pero hindi pa rin ako tumitigil.
Siguro mahal na mahal lang talaga kita. Siguro hindi pa lang ako nawawalan ng pag-asa. Siguro dahil buhay pa ako.
Sana man lang, bago ako pumanaw sa mundong ito, makita mo ulit ang kahalagahan ko.
Bakit nga ba ganon? Alam ko na itong lahat na ito pero hindi pa rin ako tumitigil.
Siguro mahal na mahal lang talaga kita. Siguro hindi pa lang ako nawawalan ng pag-asa. Siguro dahil buhay pa ako.
Sana man lang, bago ako pumanaw sa mundong ito, makita mo ulit ang kahalagahan ko.
Saturday, May 22, 2010
I Know...
I know you're reading this. I just hope it touches your heart.
**wishful thinking**
call me and i'll answer...
**wishful thinking**
call me and i'll answer...
Friday, May 21, 2010
Maybe...
I don't know what to do now that we're apart. I don't know how to live without the other half of my heart. No matter how many times I try and move on, my heart always takes me back here to you.
Don't say we're not right for each other, the way I see it, we're not meant for anyone else. Because life without you is like a broken pencil, there is no point.
Within you I lose myself. Without you I find myself wanting to become lost again.
Even the sweetest words, could not bring you back. I know, because I tried. Even the saddest tears, could not make you care. I know, because I cried.
Maybe, just maybe, if I stay in my imagination, if I create my own fantasy. I can pretend nothing is wrong and that we're the way we use to be.
Don't say we're not right for each other, the way I see it, we're not meant for anyone else. Because life without you is like a broken pencil, there is no point.
Within you I lose myself. Without you I find myself wanting to become lost again.
Even the sweetest words, could not bring you back. I know, because I tried. Even the saddest tears, could not make you care. I know, because I cried.
Maybe, just maybe, if I stay in my imagination, if I create my own fantasy. I can pretend nothing is wrong and that we're the way we use to be.
Laban...
Huwag kang susuko kung nais mo pa rin sumubok,
Huwag mong punasan ang luha mo kung nais mo pa rin umiyak,
Huwag kang makuntento sa sagot kung nais mo pa rin malaman,
Huwag mong sabihing hindi mo na sya mahal kung hindi mo sya kayang bitawan.
Huwag mong punasan ang luha mo kung nais mo pa rin umiyak,
Huwag kang makuntento sa sagot kung nais mo pa rin malaman,
Huwag mong sabihing hindi mo na sya mahal kung hindi mo sya kayang bitawan.
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Comfort Zone...
Heto na naman ako, iniwan ko sya ng mahigit 16 na buwan, pero andyan pa rin sya at naghihintay sa akin. Mabuti pa sya, kahit anong nangyari hindi nya ako iniwan, tinatanggap nya pa rin ako kahit ilang beses ko na syang iniwanan. Ang dami na naming pinagsamahan, lungkot, ligaya, kahit ilang beses kong napagbalingan ng galit at inis ko, ilang beses kong hinagis, binalibag, sinipa at hinampas, hindi pa rin sya umalis.
Akala ko hindi na ko babalik sa kanya, akala ko pang-habang-buhay na yung kaligayahang nadama ko nung umalis ako sa piling nya. Hindi pala, lahat ng bagay ay may katapusan, hindi man natin gusto, hindi man natin matanggap dahil masakit sa loob natin, pero kailangan.
Malaking parte ng buhay ko ang nawala, hindi ko alam kung maibabalik ko pa, nabasag ang damdamin ko, hindi lang dalawa o tatlong piraso, milyong-milyong piraso. Hindi ko alam kung san ko sisimulan pulutin ang mga nakakalat na parte ng damdamin ko.
Sana sa pagbalik ko sa kanya, maghilom ang malalim na sugat sa puso ko, mabuo ulit ang nabasag kong damdamin. Alam ko naman na tatanggapin nya pa rin ako.
Sabi nga sa chorus ng kanta na I’LL BE OVER YOU ni TOTO
It takes some time.
God knows how long.
I know that I can forget you,
As soon as my heart stops breaking,
Anticipating
As soon as forever is through,
I’ll be over you.
Gaano ba katagal ang FOREVER?
Akala ko hindi na ko babalik sa kanya, akala ko pang-habang-buhay na yung kaligayahang nadama ko nung umalis ako sa piling nya. Hindi pala, lahat ng bagay ay may katapusan, hindi man natin gusto, hindi man natin matanggap dahil masakit sa loob natin, pero kailangan.
Malaking parte ng buhay ko ang nawala, hindi ko alam kung maibabalik ko pa, nabasag ang damdamin ko, hindi lang dalawa o tatlong piraso, milyong-milyong piraso. Hindi ko alam kung san ko sisimulan pulutin ang mga nakakalat na parte ng damdamin ko.
Sana sa pagbalik ko sa kanya, maghilom ang malalim na sugat sa puso ko, mabuo ulit ang nabasag kong damdamin. Alam ko naman na tatanggapin nya pa rin ako.
Sabi nga sa chorus ng kanta na I’LL BE OVER YOU ni TOTO
It takes some time.
God knows how long.
I know that I can forget you,
As soon as my heart stops breaking,
Anticipating
As soon as forever is through,
I’ll be over you.
Gaano ba katagal ang FOREVER?
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
It Is You...
You are my life, you are my soul. Wish we could have been so much more. Because I've been loving you so real and you gave me reason to be here. I wish you knew, I wish you'd see, that you're the heaven within me.
Monday, May 17, 2010
Goodbye Photography...
I can’t find my groove anymore. No matter how hard I try, it’s no more there. It’s like I’m back to square one, where I don’t have any idea what photography is. Everything is like ordinary to me. Whenever I hold my camera, I’m not having that exciting feeling that you want to capture great photographs. Just 1 or 2 clicks, I’ll put my camera down and leave it.
I already dropped my multiply site. I already removed my photos on my flickr account. Maybe I’ll continue to edit pictures just for the sake of making tutorials for my fellow photographers. I’ll continue to answer their queries as long as I know the answer.
Maybe I’ll sell my camera, or I’ll just give it away. I don’t know yet what to do with it. All I know, all I feel, I have no more reason to hold and use it.
Photography doesn’t excite me anymore. I find no more reason to continue taking pictures. I find no more reason to go on a road trip and take breathtaking photographs. I find no more reason to take photos of insects and little things. I find no more reason at all.
I already dropped my multiply site. I already removed my photos on my flickr account. Maybe I’ll continue to edit pictures just for the sake of making tutorials for my fellow photographers. I’ll continue to answer their queries as long as I know the answer.
Maybe I’ll sell my camera, or I’ll just give it away. I don’t know yet what to do with it. All I know, all I feel, I have no more reason to hold and use it.
Photography doesn’t excite me anymore. I find no more reason to continue taking pictures. I find no more reason to go on a road trip and take breathtaking photographs. I find no more reason to take photos of insects and little things. I find no more reason at all.
Did It Hurt...
Someone once asked me, “Have you ever fallen in love?” Then I answered, “Of course.” Then they gave me another question, “Did it hurt?” I thought of you and cried. I told them, “Yes, very much.”
Sunday, May 16, 2010
I Failed...
People say that I have loved you my best. They say that my best was more than enough than what I could have offered and given you. I proved to the world how I sincerely love you. I proved to them how much I really do. The only thing is... I failed to prove it to you.
Loving You... Always...
Every now and then, my eyes start to water, my heart feels the hurt and my mind starts to wonder. As I’m filled with memories, I realized that I still am deeply in love with you.
Saturday, May 15, 2010
Why Can't I?
Why do I want you back? Why can’t I hate you? Why can’t I let go of your memories? Why do I find it hard to forget you? So many why’s but the most unanswered why is why do I still love YOU even after you’ve said goodbye?
Fate
Fate has brought us together, soon fate will keep us apart. But whatever fate may do to test us, how far the distance, how long the time, fate can never erase your place in my heart.
Friday, May 14, 2010
All I Ever Wanted
all I ever wanted was someone to care for me.
all I ever wanted was someone who would be there for me.
all I ever wanted was someone who would be true.
all I ever wanted was someone like YOU.
all I ever wanted was someone who would be there for me.
all I ever wanted was someone who would be true.
all I ever wanted was someone like YOU.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Flower for My Grave
I would rather have one little rose
From the garden of my love
Than to have the choicest flowers
When my stay on earth must end.
I would rather have a pleasant word
In kindness said to me
Than flattery when my heart is still,
And life has ceased to be.
I would rather have a loving smile
From my love I know it is true
Than tears shed 'round my casket
When to this world I bid adieu.
Bring me all your flowers today,
Whether pink, or white, or red
I'd rather have one blossom now
Than a truckload when I'm dead.
From the garden of my love
Than to have the choicest flowers
When my stay on earth must end.
I would rather have a pleasant word
In kindness said to me
Than flattery when my heart is still,
And life has ceased to be.
I would rather have a loving smile
From my love I know it is true
Than tears shed 'round my casket
When to this world I bid adieu.
Bring me all your flowers today,
Whether pink, or white, or red
I'd rather have one blossom now
Than a truckload when I'm dead.
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Loving You
It's really hard not to talk to you when I want to. So hard not to see you when I need to. So hard not to be with you when I long for you. So hard not to love an angel like you when I already do.
It took me a long time finding you. You're someone I want to be with even after death. And if I find myself in heaven or in hell without holding your hand. I'll go searching for you all over again.
Don't let me walk alone, I want to walk by your side. Don't let me talk to someone else, it's you I want to talk with. Don't let me fall for someone else, it's you I fell in love with.
If there's one wish I want to come true, it's to share my life with you. If there's one thing I want to let you know, it's to say I LOVE YOU so. If there's one dream I want to hold on to, it's to be with you.
Everyone tells me to give up on you. They can't see you like I do. You're the one who broke my heart, you're the reason my whole world fell apart, you're the one who makes me cry, but I still love you and I don't know why.
It took me a long time finding you. You're someone I want to be with even after death. And if I find myself in heaven or in hell without holding your hand. I'll go searching for you all over again.
Don't let me walk alone, I want to walk by your side. Don't let me talk to someone else, it's you I want to talk with. Don't let me fall for someone else, it's you I fell in love with.
If there's one wish I want to come true, it's to share my life with you. If there's one thing I want to let you know, it's to say I LOVE YOU so. If there's one dream I want to hold on to, it's to be with you.
Everyone tells me to give up on you. They can't see you like I do. You're the one who broke my heart, you're the reason my whole world fell apart, you're the one who makes me cry, but I still love you and I don't know why.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Smile
I don't know why I can't smile the way I used to do
Maybe because it's my heart that was broken into two
I just don't know until when I'll feel better
Because the only one that can make me smile again is YOU
Maybe because it's my heart that was broken into two
I just don't know until when I'll feel better
Because the only one that can make me smile again is YOU
Monday, May 10, 2010
Sunday, May 9, 2010
I Almost Killed Myself
Everything is not okay. I don't feel well. I'm jobless for almost a year, no money, no savings, because of these, my gf left me. So what's left of me? Depressions already hitting me. :(
I went to Marikina Sports Center, I run like hell, like there's no tomorrow, i glanced at the bleacher, i saw many windows upstairs, it would be a 3 floors down, i know it, we used to have class on that bleacher.
I thought of going up, throwing myself out, 3 floors down, brain particles scattered all over the sidewalk.
But i didn't, you know why? Because I'm tired, I'm sick, I'm depressed, and all that running like hell, i can't even lift my foot on one step.
Maybe tomorrow, i won't run anymore, I'll just go straight up to the bleachers and throw myself out, 3 floors down, brain particles scattered all over the sidewalk.
I went to Marikina Sports Center, I run like hell, like there's no tomorrow, i glanced at the bleacher, i saw many windows upstairs, it would be a 3 floors down, i know it, we used to have class on that bleacher.
I thought of going up, throwing myself out, 3 floors down, brain particles scattered all over the sidewalk.
But i didn't, you know why? Because I'm tired, I'm sick, I'm depressed, and all that running like hell, i can't even lift my foot on one step.
Maybe tomorrow, i won't run anymore, I'll just go straight up to the bleachers and throw myself out, 3 floors down, brain particles scattered all over the sidewalk.
Sunday, May 2, 2010
You’re My Everything
It didn’t cross my mind that our relationship will end. I never saw this coming and it’d hit hard. Up until now, I kept beating and asking myself, “What happened? Where did I go wrong? What can I do to win you back? What have I done to deserve this?” So many questions circling around my mind, but I don’t know where can I get the answers.
Ever since I met you, my world changed, you gave meaning to my life. I started to saw things from a different perspective. I enjoyed life with you. The laughter, tears and fights, it made me a different person, a better person. But now you’re gone, how can I be that better person? How can I get through the hardships in life if you’re not here by my side? How can I be happy if you’re the one who makes me happy? And now, I have nothing because you’re my everything.
I’m sorry.
I don’t want you to go. I don’t want you to leave. I don’t want you to give up. I want you to stay. I want to spend my life with you. Grow old with you.
If God still listens, please give me back this happy ending.
Ever since I met you, my world changed, you gave meaning to my life. I started to saw things from a different perspective. I enjoyed life with you. The laughter, tears and fights, it made me a different person, a better person. But now you’re gone, how can I be that better person? How can I get through the hardships in life if you’re not here by my side? How can I be happy if you’re the one who makes me happy? And now, I have nothing because you’re my everything.
I’m sorry.
I don’t want you to go. I don’t want you to leave. I don’t want you to give up. I want you to stay. I want to spend my life with you. Grow old with you.
If God still listens, please give me back this happy ending.
Monday, April 26, 2010
I Hate Myself
Being in love with you is the best thing that happened in my life. Being with you is the happiest moment of my life. I never thought my life would be happier until you came.
I did all I can do to make you happy. I did all I can do not to make you sad. I tried all my best to be a good boyfriend. And I know it wasn’t enough.
I thought we were starting over, but I guess I’m mistaken, we never started over.
I hate myself. I hate myself for all my wrongdoings. I hate myself for all my shortcomings.
I’m sorry.
It’s a long road ahead, I think I better start walking. Maybe along the way, and just maybe… There is a happy ending.
“After 15 months of laughter, smiles and tears I'm still madly in love with you~” – my love one
Friday, March 12, 2010
Boys Don't Cry
I would say I'm sorry
If I thought that it would change your mind
But I know that this time
I've said too much
Been too unkind
I try to laugh about it
Cover it all up with lies
I try and
Laugh about it
Hiding the tears in my eyes
'cause boys don't cry
Boys don't cry
I would break down at your feet
And beg forgiveness
Plead with you
But I know that
It's too late
And now there's nothing I can do
So I try to laugh about it
Cover it all up with lies
I try to
laugh about it
Hiding the tears in my eyes
'cause boys don't cry
I would tell you
That I loved you
If I thought that you would stay
But I know that it's no use
That you've already
Gone away
Misjudged your limits
Pushed you too far
Took you for granted
I thought that you needed me more
Now I would do most anything
To get you back by my side
But I just
Keep on laughing
Hiding the tears in my eyes
'cause boys don't cry
Boys don't cry
Boys don't cry
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Messed UP
Messed Up
“Life’s not fair!”. These are the few words I kept on hearing almost everyday. Sometimes I think of that too, but who am I to complain? We chooses the path we take, we decides what we will do on our lives. Along the road, we made wrong choices, decisions that we regretted, but it’s already done, we can’t turn back the hands of time and correct our wrongdoings.
I know my life’s almost a mess. No work, no funds in case of emergency (God forbid). It’s been like forever since my last work. I’m getting interviews, sometimes, and I’m able to go up to the final interview. I don’t know what the problem is, maybe my skills are not enough for them, maybe this, and maybe that or maybe I’m the problem. My girlfriend keeps on telling me that I’m the problem why am I not getting the job after the final interview. And I don’t know why I am the problem. Can someone tell me why I am the problem?
I know I’m not that good for a boyfriend. A lot of shortcomings, and I’m sorry for that, but I’m doing my best or at least I know it’s my best to please you, make you happy, compensate for what I’m lacking. My life’s empty without you.
Have you ever wonder what’s life on the other side? Well, sometimes I wish I’m dead, free from all these miseries, but it’s not the way it is, you need to move on, carry on with your life. Life sometimes sucks, not the way you want it to be.
Be patient, this is one of the mottos I have in my life. I used to have a lot of this, but now, I don’t know when I will break down.
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